The courage to be disliked : how to free yourself, change your life and achieve real happiness / Ichirō Kishimi; Fumitake Koga

Contents Include:

The First Night
Deny trauma

The unknown 'third giant'
Why people can change
Trauma does not exist
People fabricate anger
How to live without being controlled by the past
Socrates and Adler
Are you ok just as you are?
Unhappiness is something you choose for yourself
People always choose not to change
Your life is decided here and now

The Second Night
All problems are interpersonal relationship problems

Why you dislike yourself
All problems are interpersonal relationship problems
Feelings of inferiority are subjective assumptions
An inferiority complex is an excuse
Braggarts have feelings of inferiority
Life is not a competition
You're the only one worrying about your appearance
From power struggle to revenge
Admitting fault is not defeat
Overcoming the tasks that face you in life
Red string and rigid chains
Don't fall for the 'life-lie'
From the Psychology of possession to the psychology of practice

The Third Night
Discard other people's tasks

Deny the desire for recognition
Do not live to satisfy the expectation of others
How to rid yourself of interpersonal relationship problems
Cut the Gordian Knot
Desire for recognition makes you unfree
What real freedom is
You hold the cards to interpersonal relationships

The Fourth Night
Where the centre of the world is

Individual psychology and holism
The goal of interpersonal relationships is feeling of community
Why am I only interested in myself?
You are not the centre of the world
Listen to the voice of a larger community
Do not rebuke or praise
The encouragement approach
How to feel you have value
Exist in the present
People cannot make proper use of self

The Fifth Night
To live in earnest in here and now

Excessive self-consciousness stifles the self
Not self affirmation - self acceptance
The difference between trust and confidence
The essence of work is a contribution to the common good
Young people walk ahead of adults
Workaholism is a life-lie
You can be happy now
Two paths travelled by those wanting to be 'special beings'
The courage to be normal
Life is a series of moments
Live like you're dancing
Shine a light on the here and now
The greatest life-lie
Give meaning to seemingly meaningless life